Sunday, 15 January 2012

A week to Remember.

I have an abundance of memories from the last week. Probably the most emotional and hectic week to date.

I left early Saturday (7th) morning to Picton to Catch a boat to Furneaux Lodge to Photograph a Wedding. It was awesome to be a part of and such an amazing location. The weather held off for the day but when we woke the next day there was a storm brewing!! Our boat arrived to take us back to Picton and the Boat driver said that we shouldn't really be on the water and needed to get going....! Great!! Made it safely though and Cam collected me and we headed straight to Christchurch. Felt like such a super star flinging from place to place!!

We got to Christchurch and headed round to our friend Stacey's house. She is wonderful and had organised a little fundraiser for me. We rocked on up and surprised everyone and it was so good to see all that were there. I am yet to find the words that describe what it feels like to have people give so much of themselves to help you out....Their time, generosity, love and their hair. Theres not a word that can tell you all how I grateful I am for everything that you have done for me. Its not just in terms of people at the Fundraiser but to all those that have sent emails, texts, baking, flowers and popped round just to see how I am through out everything. I will be forever grateful and hope that one day I can help out each of you as you have done for me.

These are the Gentlemen that gave up a little bit of themselves in order to raise money for me. Brendon, Daniel and Matthew.

It was such a good night and a lot of laughs!! The next day I had a blood test and an ovary ultra sound to see how my eggs were doing and if I was ready for harvesting. I was definitely ready to go!! I had walked around for the past few weeks feeling very heavy and at nights feeling rather puffy.

It was quite interesting hearing peoples reactions when I said that I was feeling uncomfortable, especially those who have had been through child birth. "You dont know what it feels like to be bloated etc" were said often and it got to the point where I felt like saying "Ok well you inject this months worth of injections and then get back to me." No way was I saying that I could relate to being pregnant but yes I was really uncomfortable and despite having had the eggs harvested, I still am! Please - any Woman that have been through IVF back me up!!!!???

The Nurses told me to take my stopper injection and booked me in for Wednesday. It all sort of hit me after that and I realised that Cam and I were soon to be parents...Not your typical parents but parents nonetheless. We went out for tea the night before and I ate a whole pizza in preparation for not being able to eat the next day :)

We arrived early and they did all the usual tests, which always start with me repeating my name, address and D.O.B. The first drug they gave me was in the form of a little pill that would make me feel like I "have had a few wines...." The nurse left me to get changed in to a sexy gown and between going to the toilet to get changed and leaving the toilet the pill had definitely worked. I was giggling and could just string a sentence together. The nurse came back and asked if I was feeling ok to which I remember responding to with simply a smile. She asked me to repeat my details once more (which was REALLY hard) and she walked me down to the operating room.

With Cam in toe, we walked into the room where our babies would be made.....haha. 

I got all set up on the bed and they explained to me how the procedure would go etc etc and then the nurse gave me the morphine. Well that was the end of any recollection I had of that day....! The last thing I remember is saying "Woah" as the Morphine circulated my system. The rest is a blur.

I came to in the recovery room propt up in a lazy boy with a blanket and Cam sitting at my feet. I didn't get knocked out by the drugs but my memory has been completely wiped. I was talking to the doctors as they collected the eggs but I couldn't tell you what we were talking about. Feeling a little dopey and quite queasy, I lay still until the nurse came in. She could see that I wasn't feeling the best and gave me a little pill to help with the sick feeling. They were extremely happy with outcome and the nurses were quite excited for me. 13 eggs were collected and that stage 7 embryos had matured and they were going to keep an eye on them over the next couple of days. We left the Fertility Clinic after a couple of hours of rest and headed home for more rest. I felt slow on it for the next couple of days but compared to how I was expecting to feel, it wasn't too bad at all. 

The next day I went and pampered myself with my friend Catherine who was getting married and her gorgeous sister Alex. We went and had a pedicure and manicure - It was so amazing! We then went to the Wedding rehearsal and the Wedding excitement kicked in!! No need for sugar, we were bouncing off the walls with excitement. We went out for dinner with the Family of the Bride and groom and the rest of the Wedding party that night. I have to admit, I probably over did it that day considering what I had done to me the day before. The only was to describe how I felt is that it felt like I REALLY needed to go number twos all the time! So strange. Cam kept reminding me that I would be really bruised etc and I needed to take it easy. 

The next day was Wedding day. When Miss Catherine Lyttle became Catherine Watson. The Wedding of Catherine and Alex was actually the most stunning day ever. It was amazing from start to finish and I adored being her Bridesmaid. 

After the week that I had I was more than ready to come home but knew that reality would hit when I did. 

On Wednesday the Eighteenth, at Ten O'clock I will be having my first round of Chemo.

Although I know that it will be ok, I am absolutely packing myself. The thing I am struggling with the most is not wanting to let clients down and feeling like Im slipping back. Im always working towards something and wanting to feel like I am reaching goals and lately I feel like I cant get anywhere while having Cancer. It feels like theres always an appointment to go to or a test to have. I kick myself when I think like that because I hate to feel like the Cancer is slowing me down. I also hate that I can admit to feeling like that.....But I guess that its all a part of of this Journey and I have to expect ups and expect downs. I just dont want to let this alter my hard work but I might just have to take a step back for a while....This year Cam and I were aiming to be making the move to Australia. There were a couple of Studios that I had eyed up to apply at. Its something we will be doing when I get the all clear. Next year. Thats the goal. I want to be overseas somewhere working in the Photography Industry. I dont care if I'm working for somebody - just to get some different experience would be amazing. Travel! Its all I want to do!! 

Without further ado, let me introduce you to our 5 wee embryo babies:

We originally had 7 but only 5 lasted the distance. An amazing results considering they have also frozen 5 of my eggs as well. We have joked over the last couple of days as we showed our friends and family this photo. We have established that the 3 on the left are children that will be like me, organised and in order and the two on the right will most definitely be like Cam. Crazy and a little bit spastic at times haha 

As I face this week, I will remember the good moments I had last week and remember all the kind and wonderful things you have all said and done for me. Also "Raindrops Keep falling on my head" is my new anthem. I especially love these lyrics: "But there's one thing I know The blues they send to meet me won't defeat me It won't be long till happiness steps up to greet me!" :) 

I will blog once I have had my first treatment and let you know how it all goes. Thank you all for being the Wonderful people you are. A.x

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